Stupid Interview Questions: The Craig Kilborn Edition

Talent agencies are filled with hard driving assholes who aspire to make your life miserable.  This is nothing new.  But you'd like to hope for a bit of normalcy when it comes to their HR staff.  Turns out that's not the case, or at least not the case at a certain acronymed firm.  How do I know this?  Look no further than this for a stupid interview question:

What are the five most traumatic experiences in your life?

Luckily I wasn't the applicant facing this question.  But then I started to think about it.  What would I say if I had been the one in the hot seat?  I couldn't answer this honestly because the question is so awful and inappropriate that it doesn't deserve an honest answer. But I know I'd have fun with it.  I'm thinking I'd answer like this:

1. When the temp agency made me take a typing test on a QWERTY keyboard.  I only know the Dvorak version.
2. Watching the Shaquille O'Neal movie marathon they just aired on BET: Old Skool. Kazaam, Steel and Blue Chips make Freddy Got Fingered look like Kurosawa.
3. When I came in last at the junior high science fair.  Turns out creating a small-scale meth lab wasn't as impressive Michelle Potter's model of the Solar System.
4. The time Uncle Rico stabbed Aunt Tina last Thanksgiving.  Dinner was so awkward after that.
5. When I farted in your office two minutes ago.  I'm a little nervous.

If you have a stupid interview question to share, please send it to TempX@tempdiaries.com or put it in the "Overheard in Hollywood" box to the left. All submissions will remain anonymous.