Monday, August 24, 2009

Un Café Andalou

The only things scarier that Ari Emanuel is Ari Emanuel's Espresso Macchiato (w/three shots). Can Temp X save himself or will he be destroyed like so many others before him?


6 comments:

Anonymous said...

What about those of us who make less than $12/hr?

Anonymous said...

No, no, no!!! Temp X gets trampled, maimed and killed by Ari's Espresso Macchiato (w/3 shots). That's what all the audience tests, committees and Executive VP Second- and Third- Guessers agreed to after 17 tests and during our subsequent 5-Star executive retreat, don't you remember??? Don't forget, if this movie doesn't bring in $75 million opening weekend, 1,000 more employees (who actually do all the work) will be cut and more work will be farmed out to Sri Lanka, India and the Himilayas. Our target demo of 12 to 17 year old boys all want Temp X's head to be severed and stuffed up his own ass by Ari's Espresso Macchiato (w/3 shots) -- preferably while Temp X is still alive. WE CAN'T PISS OFF THE 14 YEAR OLD BOYS OR THE PICTURE WILL BE A FLOP!!! (And everyone knows the artistic vision of 14 year old boys is FAR superior to the overpriced talentless hacks to whom we pay 7-8 figure salaries to create this crap!!!). We're going to have to push back the release date at least 3 more times and re-shoot the chase scene to make it more WHAT'S UP DOC? meets BOURNE IDENTITY as well as the Temp X decapitation scene to be more GODFATHER meets JULIE & JULIA. As all of us high-level execs are about to leave town this week on our well-deserved vacations since Labor Day is coming up in less than 2 weeks, we'll need the complete re-writes by tomorrow morning. We'll talk about those re-writes in some "power" meetings and get back to you sometime after the end of Ramadan. AND REMEMBER: YOU ARE FINISHED IN THIS TOWN IF THAT RE-WRITE ISN'T COMPLETED AND ON EVERYONE'S DESK BY 7:30 TOMORROW MORNING SO WE CAN GET OUR COVERAGE BY LUNCHTIME!!! Hope your wife's cancer is in remission and that everything is well with you. Ciao!

Anonymous said...

I still think you're brilliant (and no this is not his mother). Perhaps Clay Temp X should hang with Mr. Bill? OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Anonymous said...

I can still hear the laughing at WMEE all the way from here.

Anonymous said...

I just watched this at a screening in a noir festival in SoMa. The man behind me wet his pants after the crush scene. The stench was so bad that I didn't see the very end, but another audience member said there's a sequel teaser?!

Anonymous said...

I once was a temp from Nantucket
Whose paycheck was so small, I said suck it.

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