Overheard in Hollywood

Say what?

In a town with so many bad ideas and foolish people, it's impossible not to hear people saying ridiculous things.  That's why I started "Overheard in Hollywood."  If you've eavesdropped on inanity that you'd like share, send it along to tempx@tempdiaries.com or submit it via the the submission box in the left column.  Of course, everything is confidential, anonymous and I promise not to tell anyone.

And with that, here are the exciting ramblings from around town.

INT. TALENT AGENCY
A douchey talent agent playing the role perfectly -- well-groomed 5 o'clock shadow, expensive suit, iPhone holster -- escorts an interview candidate out of his office.

AGENT

You certainly give good meeting.

The candidate smiles confidently - he's learned enough "Douche-speak" to know this is a sign of approval.  He then chooses to steer the conversation to the interview to make one last good impression.

CANDIDATE

I'm very interested in the position and believe...

AGENT

(interrupting)

And I can already tell that you wouldn't annoy the shit out of me.

The candidate bites the inside of his face as he's not really sure how to respond to this "compliment."  Luckily the agent, not short of words, continues what is essentially a monologue.

AGENT

We'll be in touch.

[Post Script: They never called.]

Or if you're interested in celebrating your Mexican heritage, you might like the following post...

INT. MAJOR MOVIE STUDIO
A marketing executive is animated and slightly perplexed -- almost like her dog just started talking to her.

MARKETING EXECUTIVE

Guess what I just learned?

MARKETING EXECUTIVE #2

Tell me.

MARKETING EXECUTIVE

I just found out that Cinco de Mayo is on the same day every year.

Me sorprendiria si sabe como amarar sus abujillas.