Here's what you employed people missed out on

If math serves me properly, seven out of every eight people reading this blog are employed. That's the "glass-mostly-full" view of California's 12.1 percent unemployment rate. So while you're off making money, hanging around the water cooler and talking about how you hope to have a job next week, I'm testing out unemployment for you. Here's what you missed out on...

• Nothing happened on Monday. My pimps didn't call me.
  
• I didn't have quarters to do laundry. But since I didn't make any money, I suppose that's a good thing.
• Stage 15 of the Vuelta a Espana was a blow out. Even I can't waste two hours watching a bike race when the lead is 20 minutes.
• I went to Starbucks and screwed around for an hour or so. It was packed.
• I found out the place I interviewed at two weeks ago sacked the person who interviewed me. So that's a dead deal.
• I ate too many Butterfinger mini candy bars. Damn you Halloween displays and your evil temptations.
• Olbermann is on vacation this week, so we're stuck with the über-paranoid David Shuster. I think Howard Fineman hates him.
• Fox moved The Simpsons reruns from 6 to 6:30. Now I have to decide between watching the national news and Bart, Lisa, Homer, Marge and Maggie. Guess who won?
• My desk chair broke almost hurtling me into orbit (ok, perhaps that was needlessly dramatic, but it is busted).
• I flipped on the tube figuring prime time has to offer something. And the only new episode was of America's Got Talent. So instead I watched a re-run of House where Hugh Laurie goes through the DTs. Did I just spend an hour watching someone fake puke?
• I still don't care about Kanye West or Taylor Dayne or Taylor Hicks or whatever her name is. May I be completely conspiratorial and suggest Jay Leno/NBC paid Kanye to act the fool to bolster opening night show ratings.
• I thought about applying for work and realized that my resume is gonna be at the bottom of a stack of thousands, so I skipped that.

I promise to do better tomorrow. If I get work, that'll help. Then I can bitch about the work I have as opposed to now where I bitch about the work I don't have.

Spinal Tap - Bitch School
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