Wednesday, July 16, 2008

"The Streets of Century City (A Temp's Lament)"

Temp X has decided to become a country music star. Heck, if Jessica Simpson can do it, anyone can. So enjoy Temp X's first foray into this truly American art form. It's to the tune of "The Streets of Laredo (A Cowboy's Lament)."

Tip: Print out the lyrics and then click here or here. Johnny Cash will start singing, but ignore him and sing along with the lyrics below.

As I walked out on Century City,
As I walked on the Avenue of Stars;
I spied a poor Temp playing in the streets,
Running and jumping and lunging at cars.

"My name is [Redacted] and I was a temp there,
I worked for an agent who yelled all the time;
That his coffee's too cold and his office too small,
And regardless who did it, all the fault was mine."

"I see by your sweat stains that you worked in Talent,
Was it Lourd, Nicita or Kevin Huvane?"
That poor sap, I thought, just out of college,
Squashed to a pulp in not the least bit humane.

"I tried for a while, I put up with such shit;
The screaming, the swearing and the throwing of things.
Oh to be a writer, that was my life's dream
But I'm shackled right here until this phone rings."

He talked of abuses, of picking up laundry,
Of shining their shoes and wiping their desks.
"That's Hollywood," I told him, "It's filled with big egos.
So all admins suffer, especially the temps."

"I could take it no longer, I guess I just snapp-ed
I told him 'Go shove it! Go find someone new!
To yell at, to curse at and to dial your phone.'
As I walked out the door he said, 'Who are you?'"

I was nameless and faceless, an anonymous cog
With no feelings, no thoughts, no grand ideas
This pushed me over, right over the edge
He knew not my name and I'd worked there 2 years.

He walked away out into Century City
That Temp walked right out on the Avenue of Stars
That Temp quit "The Business" in the City of Dreams
Or maybe he just chose to go to a bar.

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