Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Wanted: Copy Editor

Hollywood vanity knows no limits. Today's acquisition of Deadline Hollywood by Mail.com [Tip to Mail.com: Change your name.] is just the latest example of hubris gone amok.

I have no idea what Deadline Hollywood is worth, but for the sake of argument let's just say it's worth $1 million (although Sharon Waxman figures it to be about half that.) So on the media landscape this transaction is the equivalent of buying 10 seconds of a Superbowl commercial. It's a nothing. It's a flea on the tail of the dog. It's about as significant as Episode 2 of Cavemen.

But you'd never know that purchase was of such little consequence based on today's novella of a press release. Clocking in at a whopping 1,200 words, Mail.com used every platitude they could and a few of them twice to tout the deal. [PR Exec advises: "More steak, less sizzle."] If you didn't know anything about Deadline Hollywood or Darling Nikki, you'd have thought they just bought the love child of Mother Teresa and Bob Woodward.

Following is a list of just some of phrases used to describe Nikki that stuff today's press release. Grab a barf bag, you'll need it:
  1. "Highly respected"
  2. "Widely read"
  3. "Foremost entertainment business journalists in the world"
  4. "Uniquely Candid"
  5. "Informed and authoritative"
  6. "In details...only she can uncover"
  7. "Queen of Hollywood News"
  8. "Unrivaled network of high-level industry contacts"
  9. "Best connected reporter"
  10. "A Hollywood power broker"
  11. "The sheriff in town"
  12. "Queen"
  13. "Journalist of the Year"
  14. "World-class journalist"
  15. "Unequivocally recognized"
  16. "Unique voice"
  17. "Leading authority"
  18. "She has raised the bar - if not changed the game - of entertainment journalism"
  19. "World-class journalist"
  20. "50 Best Websites for Moviemakers"
Oh, and by way of comparison, President Obama's statement on the unrest in Iran was only a 162 words, or 1/8th the length of the DHD/Mail.com press release.

Hey Nikki, let me know if you need a copy editor. I can help.

[Update: Apparently the site sold for $14 million. I have only three things to say about that W-T-F?!]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I have to say, Nikki sure posts a lot more about herself than Hollywood. Every other time I look on her site, she hasn't posted in a week, and there's an advisory saying she's sick or too busy.
Favorite post of hers?
"I owe you an explanation for my light posting and prolonged absence: I was the victim of a crime"

I mean, it's not funny she was a victim of a crime, but it's just that she found it so newsworthy.

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